I'm Losing My Mom - Page 6

Murp.mm · #51 04-13-2006, 06:52 PM

Thank you all for your concern. I have been very busy with mom and have not posted lately. Mom is still hanging on but right now I sincerely wish that God would take her as she is having pain. I have trouble seeing her like this. I know there is a wonderful place waiting for her. We however don't choose our time to go. This is very strange. Last night mom's first cousin died. We didn't tell her so as not to upset her. The first thing today she was talking about him and his family and I figured that my brother must have told her. I asked him and he said no but she talked to him the same way.

She doesn't complain but it is very hard to get her to eat. Her gums and mouth are sore and she gets stomach sick after a few bites of food. Some days she can get some breakfast down but for the rest of the day it is just little bits of something soft. Today she wanted chocolate so I went downstairs to get some out of the machine but when I got back she was asleep. She couldn't remember asking for it but did suck on it just a little bit. Tea was always her favourite but now it's hard to get her to drink half a cup. Her temp. is up and down, mostly up and she is very clammy. She has a fan in her room which is on most of the time to keep her temp down. She did have some sore spots from lying so much but thank God they have cleared up except for behind her ear where the oxygen hose runs. She gets excellent care at the nursing home and the family is always back and forth to keep an eye on things. Things are on hold at my house right now. Mom comes first. I run Ali in the morning and then head to the nursing home. The weather is great here now and if it is not too late when I come home I walk Ali again. The excercise helps to clear my head. Mom took sick on Mar. 19 and the doctor didn't give her much time. But she has proved him wrong. I love my mom but I hate seeing her like this. I talk to her and tell her all the news - sometimes she is aware and sometimes she is off in another world. Please keep praying that God will take her in her sleep and she will not suffer any more.

Anja- Thank you for that beautiful poem. That was so kind of you. This poem is so true of mothers. I always say mothers are the foundation of a family.

Donna1969 · #52 04-13-2006, 07:04 PM

Where have I been?? I did not see this post until now. I am so very sorry you have to see your Mom like this. Its good that you are at peace that she will be at peace and painfree when the Lord does take her home. Let her know you are okay with it. I knw my grandparents both held on for those in the family (my mom and her sister) who were NOT ok with letting go. Once they finally realized it was best for my grandparents to let go, they told them that they were at peace with it and if my grandma/grandpa were ok with leaving,they were ok with them going.

It wasn't but a few hours after that, that the good Lord took my grandma home (and grandpa).

I will keep you and your Mom in my thoughts and prayers. Its so unfair to have to see a parent dwindle away like you are

Murp.mm · #53 04-13-2006, 07:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Donna1969

Where have I been?? I did not see this post until now. I am so very sorry you have to see your Mom like this. Its good that you are at peace that she will be at peace and painfree when the Lord does take her home. Let her know you are okay with it. I knw my grandparents both held on for those in the family (my mom and her sister) who were NOT ok with letting go. Once they finally realized it was best for my grandparents to let go, they told them that they were at peace with it and if my grandma/grandpa were ok with leaving,they were ok with them going.

It wasn't but a few hours after that, that the good Lord took my grandma home (and grandpa).

I will keep you and your Mom in my thoughts and prayers. Its so unfair to have to see a parent dwindle away like you are

Thank you Donna. You have had a lot to contend with yourself with your new babies and all. I hope they are doing well.

Donna, I think I am ready to let Mom go when I see her like this but I hope everyday that she will be a bit better and continue to get better but I know that is a lot to ask for. I am also being selfish when I think that way. So many have lost their moms and dad's when they were young and I have been so blessed to have her so long. But I honestly wish it would all go away and I could turn back the clock to when we used to do so many things together like Nicole and I do now. But again, I am being selfish. This is so much of an emotional roller coaster. But I am strong and have been there before with my dad and sister and brother. I should be used to it by now but I guess nonone ever gets used to losing someone they love.

Once again, thanks for your support and prayers. Everyone here is so good.

lafsalot · #54 04-13-2006, 07:35 PM

I stayed with both of my parents 24/7 and was their primary care giver for the last few months of their lives, so I truly can empathize with what you are going through.

I will keep you all in my thoughts and will pray for your mother's peaceful passing ~ Cathy

Donna1969 · #55 04-13-2006, 07:36 PM

I lost my dad a few days before I turned 4.

So the thought of loosing my Mom terrifies me. Its been she, me and my younger sister forever. She's not old by any sense of the word and is in relativly good health. But when the time comes I hope I am able to follow my own advice and let her know that if she is at peace with going "home" I am at peace with it too. (even if in my heart I am not, I'll try to be convincing enough that I am)

Again..so very sorry you are going through this, that your mom is in pain and that you have to watch all of this.

(my babies are doing very well..thank you for thinking of ME at a time like this

Britbox · #56 04-15-2006, 07:49 AM

If I could give my mum the world,
Or anything she wanted,
I'd give her my own heart and soul,
And leave my own heart haunted.

I'd take upon myself her life,
With all It's strife and pain,
And let her ease into some space,
Where she could live again.

The pain for me would not be pain,
At least not for a while;
For I'd be doing it for her,
And I would see her smile.

I wish that I could take her heart,
And cleanse it with my tears,
And make her sorrow go away,
And answer all her fears.

I wish, I wish, but then I can't,
As I watch helplessly,
And take her in my arms and say,
I wish that it were me.

But loving is a hard, hard way,
With all the pain it brings.
And yet there is no other way,
To touch the heart of things.

I found this poem, written by Nicholas Gordon, and thought it was so touching, that I had to share it with you......keeping you in my thoughts.

Murp.mm · #57 04-15-2006, 02:52 PM

At 12:40 p.m. today my precious mom passed on to eternity. She had a hard time since yesterday especially with breathing. I stayed with her all day and night and just as I was returning from a quick nap she passed away. I was seconds from being there. She did make one quick exhale as I approached her bed. My brother and his wife were there. I knew it was coming, prayed for her to pass, but now I have this big empty hole in my stomach. I know she is in a wonderful place and is watching over me but I am nevertheless hurting badly. Thank you all for your kind support and prayers. You don't know how much they have meant to me. God Bless You All. I was blessed to have this beautiful person in my life for so long.

Murp.mm · #58 04-15-2006, 03:03 PM

Britbox: Thank you for this poem. This is just want I needed today. I appreciate it so much. If I could bring my mom back by the number of tears I've cried, she would be here in a heartbeat. I would certainly take away any of her pain and take it upon myself just to have her back with me. So for everyone who has a mom please love and care for her because you'll never know the heartache until she's no longer here. I miss my mom so much already and she's only gone a few hours. God Bless you and everyone at Boxer World for your kindness during this difficult time.

Austin's Mom · #59 04-15-2006, 03:22 PM

I'm so sorry about your Mom. Even though her pain is over it doesn't make it any easier for you. It's still a huge loss. ((hugs)) May your Mom rest in peace and be forever in your heart.

Britbox · #60 04-15-2006, 05:01 PM

I am so sorry, that you have lost your dear mum, and she has lost her brave battle.
My heart goes out to you at this sad time, I know that no words can help you today..But remember, your mum was always your guiding light, and she'll never, ever leave you, now she is your guardian angel,.... and you will stay forever surrounded and protected by her love....God Bless you, and may your mum rest in peace. (((hugs))).