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I just came across this thread now and my sister is somewhat in the same situation.
She is in her late 20's early 30's, she has been with her bf for about 10 years, they are not engaged (although she wants to be) and he doesnt seem in any rush to get engaged. He also has a 14 year old daughter from a previous relationship. For the longest time my sister has said she doesnt want children--and that was fine with him because he doesnt want any either. Her reasoning behind that is that we have a history of Down Syndrome in our family. My dads little sister has it (she wasnt expected to live past 3--she just turned 41 yesterday but sadly was just diagnosed with cancer and has less than a year left) While my Mom was pregnant with me, there was apossibility Id have Down syndrome so she did a test on me ( i cant remember what its called) and they took a skin sample from the bottom of my foot to see if I would be born with it.
My sister is worried if she did have a child, it would have Down syndrome and she wouldnt be able to handle it. But in the last few years, she has wavered back and fourth between wanting a child and not wanting one. But Now I think she has setteled on not wanting one, and we've all accepted it. Her child is her Shitzu Gizmo.
Me on the other hand, I do want a child-- i work with kids i love them. But the theres a side of me who doesnt want children simply because I cant picture myself as a Mom. But I am only 19 so I have lots of time to make my decision.
You have made your decision, and youve had this decision for im sur eyour whole life and you wont change it. As hard as it will be for your husband to grasp this, he needs to deal with it, he knew coming into the relationship this is what you wanted and he accepted it then, he has to accept it now.
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Shannon hopelessly devoted to
Cinnamon 07/31/04
Brandy 04/26/97
Sheba- waiting at the Bridge for me
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