First car accident, could use some comforting words

[Caney Creek]

Yesterday I reached a milestone in life that I hoped I'd never reach: my first car accident. I had a dozen things on my "to do" list and another 4 dozen things on my mental "to do" list (nothing new) and I was rushing to get them all done. Somewhere in between doing loads of laundry, printing photos from last week's photo session, and puppy-proofing the house, I realized I was late to pick up Jackson. I usually go to see him on weekdays at lunchtime while his dad is at work, but yesterday I was bringing Jackson back home with me for 2 nights while his dad is in Vegas. So I rushed over there to get him. Everything was just fine, I got all his things together and we headed back home.

Driving back to the house I was in a bit of a daze and just missed the right turn into a friend's neighborhood, where I was already late (again) picking up the list of addresses that I was to deliver photos to that day. I made a hasty decision, put on the brakes and pulled towards the left lane to make a u-turn. Next thing I know, WHAM! side-swiped by a chevy tahoe. I didn't check my blind spot.

Good news Everyone is OK. Me, Jackson, everyone in the other car -- we're all just fine.

Bad news The car does not look good, to say the least. The driver door will only open a few inches; I had to climb out the passenger side. I couldn't bring myself to take a good look at the damage, but from what I could see when I was in the car, there are huge dents and scratches from the front bumper all the way to the 2nd row door (it's a 4-door Toyota Tacoma). Oh, I also got a ticket for an "improper lane change."

Worse news I was driving BF's truck. He is out of town this week, chaperoning high school spring-breakers on a 7-day cruise through the Caribbean. I borrowed his truck so that I could put Jackson's crate in the bed. At the time it seemed more convenient than searching the garage for Caney's old crate and then putting it together. Or I could've just continued driving SAFELY to the next u-turn when I realized I'd missed the neighborhood.

Now I can add to my never-ending list: pay for a ticket; pay for BF's insurance deductible and pray that his insurance rates don't go up; and, figure out how I'm going to come up with all that money.

BF is due home late Saturday, maybe Sunday, so I have from now until then to figure out how I'm going to break the news. That truck is his baby. I feel so horrible.


Thanks for listening to me ramble.

[LILYLARUE]

Awe! I feel so bad for you! How frightening! Thank God you all were ok. Atleast physically. Emotionally you must be a wreck!

I'm sure a glass of wine, boxer kisses and a few from you will soften his reaction and be very glad you were all ok. His truck can be fixed.

Good luck and relax........you love him for a reason, and I bet one of them is his kindness and empathy.

[Cami]

I am SO glad that everyone involved is OK.

THAT IS THE MOST IMPORTANT THING.

"Things" can be repaired or replaced.

I'll share something with you that someone passed along to me once. It has stuck with me and comes to mind on a regular basis when I feel rushed or overwhelmed.

I'm not trying to sound "preachy" but it might come across that way so I hope I don't offend anyone.

No matter WHERE we are at any given time or WHAT we are doing it is the PLACE to be or the right THING that we are meant to be experiencing. Meaning......everything happens for a reason. We don't always know what those reasons are but we will learn from them IF we are open to the lesson.

In this situation perhaps you were being told to stop overloading yourself with too many tasks or thoughts. Perhaps stop going through life on autopilot and start seeing important things that you might have stopped seeing due to trying to do so much at once. Sort of like a precursor or "warning" so to speak that if you didn't slow down and pay attention to IMPORTANT things that you may just miss out on something really terrific.

Of course your "lesson" could be anything and only you will know what that may have been but when things like this happen I think the universe is trying to tell us something!

You will figure out a way to break the news to your BF and life WILL go on! It just feels like it totally sucks right now since you are so close to the event. Next spring the whole episode will be a distant memory.

[kayboxer]

Love the advice Cami! You are so right. Sometimes we get in such a rush to get everything done we forget to stop and smell the roses. A house will always need to be cleaned, an errand always will need to be ran. If it is a beautiful day, go out and enjoy it and wait until the next bad weather day to clean! In Kansas, it's that way quite frequently.

Caney, I'm so glad everybody was okay. Yes, the truck may be his baby, but so are you! He will probably be upset, which is expected, but hopefully he will be more relieved that you are okay and nobody was hurt. The truck can be fixed, you might not have been able too. You have an angel somewhere trying to tell you something. It will all work out.

[joeys mom]

First of all I am glad that you and Jackson are ok I am sure you are so upset, poor thing
I am sure that BF will take the news of his baby ok. My BF adores his baby (dodge truck) too and so I can only imagine the anxiety you are feeling knowing you have to tell him, but dont worry to much and I am sure he will be soooo glad that YOU are ok and that the truck can be fixed.

I hope you arent sore and all else goes well!

Today will be a better day

[RoxiesEcho]

The important thing is that no one was hurt. I know that I would be totally bummed if something happened to my car and your BF will probably not be pleased but I'm sure that after the intial shock he will feel the same as we do. It's just a "thing" and "things" can be fixed. Keep your chin up!

[atlasmom911]

Sorry to hear that you were in an accident. I am so glad that no one was injured.

[Caney Creek]

Originally Posted by LILYLARUE

Good luck and relax........you love him for a reason, and I bet one of them is his kindness and empathy.

SO true That is definitely the biggest reason I fell in love with him. When Joel and I first started dating 4 years ago I had just recently broken up with "the one" and was NOT ready to start a new relationship. In the first week we were hanging out I actually laid out all my emotional baggage expecting that it would push him away. He sure proved me wrong!

Originally Posted by Cami

In this situation perhaps you were being told to stop overloading yourself with too many tasks or thoughts. Perhaps stop going through life on autopilot and start seeing important things that you might have stopped seeing due to trying to do so much at once. Sort of like a precursor or "warning" so to speak that if you didn't slow down and pay attention to IMPORTANT things that you may just miss out on something really terrific.

I KNOW this is true! In my 8 years of driving I have never been in an accident until now, and just in the past few months I have been so distracted with my thoughts while driving that I almost hit another car TWICE doing the same thing -- not checking my blind spot. I hate that this time I had to be driving BF's car, but IF I had been in my 93 Honda Prelude we would have more likely been hurt, and it would DEFINITELY be totaled.

Originally Posted by kayboxer

Yes, the truck may be his baby, but so are you!

I can't tell you how much that made me smile Thank you!

Originally Posted by joeys mom

I hope you arent sore and all else goes well!

Today will be a better day

Surprisingly (and luckily) not one person involved in the accident was hurt, not even a little. I'm not sore at all... just a little emotional I'm SO glad that the impact was as light as it was, because Jackson was not strapped in at all. I hate to think what could have happened to him. As it was, he barely moved in the passenger seat when we were hit.

Originally Posted by RoxiesEcho

I know that I would be totally bummed if something happened to my car and your BF will probably not be pleased but I'm sure that after the intial shock he will feel the same as we do. It's just a "thing" and "things" can be fixed. Keep your chin up!

Thank you all so much for your advice and support. It has helped me TREMENDOUSLY today, you have no idea! You guys are the best!

[kathysboxer]

First and foremost, thank God everyone is ok. That is most important (as you already know). Yes, BF will be upset at first, but once the "shock" wears off, he'll be ok. There is a reason they call them ACCIDENTS. You didn't mean to cause any harm to anyone or anything. It just happened. Quite a few years ago, I was hit by a girl (she was 17) and she was soo upset. I kept telling her the vehicles are repairable. As long as we were ok, that was all that mattered. I tried my best to comfort her. She was so upset. Her mom was so grateful that I was so kind to her. Like I told her, it's called an accident for a reason.
About 2 weeks ago, I almost was in a wreck. I wasn't paying attention, had my mind running 500 different ways, and ran a red light. Almost sideswiped someone. I was shaken up over that.
I will say a prayer or two for you and send some healing, calming vibes your way also.

[Austin's Mom]

I agree the most important thing is that everyone is ok. My best friend who lives across the street from me flipped her Explorer the other day about three houses down from where we live. She called me and said "look outside at my truck". I went to the door, looked down the street and saw it laying on it's side. By the time I ran down there she was climbing out the window. And all she was doing at the time was looking down for some change to get coffee before going to work. She hit a parked PT Cruiser and flipped on her side. Cami is right-everything happens in life the way it's supposed to. And things can be replaced, but your life can't.